I was sitting in my tiny Brooklyn apartment, trying to stream my cousin's boxing match from China, when the video kept buffering at the worst possible moment - right during the stare-down. Two fighters, eyes locked, neither blinking. The screen froze just as their gazes met, and I remembered what my boxing coach uncle used to say: 'The fight starts long before the first punch.'

That frozen frame took me back to watching Olympic boxer Li Qian's interview last week. She described exactly this moment - the psychological warfare that begins with something as simple as eye contact. 'Just stare into your opponent's eyes,' she said in that calm, measured tone that contrasts so sharply with her fierce ring presence. 'Whoever blinks first has already lost half the battle.'

What struck me wasn't just the strategy, but the transformation. The woman who now commands the ring with what commentators call 'ice-cold intensity' was once described by her coaches as having 'a personality like someone quietly embroidering at home.' I could almost picture her - the shy girl who probably blushed when spoken to, now staring down world champions without flinching.

My cousin, who started boxing to overcome his own social anxiety, told me he practices this exact thing during sparring sessions. 'You can feel the tension in those seconds before the bell,' he messaged me after his last match. 'Your gloves feel heavier, the smell of the gym's disinfectant gets sharper, and all you can hear is your own breathing. Then the ref says 'box' and everything else disappears.'

Li Qian's journey resonates because it's not just about winning medals. It's about that moment when the quiet girl realizes her quietness isn't weakness - it's potential energy waiting to be channeled. The way she describes it, boxing didn't change who she was; it helped her become more of who she could be.

Back in my apartment, the stream finally caught up. The fighters broke their stare, the bell rang, and the match began. But I kept thinking about those frozen seconds of eye contact, and how sometimes the biggest battles we fight are the ones no one else can see - whether in a ring in China or a streaming app in Brooklyn.

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